M for motivation

I think its cool that my name starts with the same letter as motivation because dang... the stuff that you can do when you're motivated. So I'm not going to brag but I do know I am smart and capable but I also know I'm lazy and somewhat selfish. If I'm not getting anything out of something, I would never bother putting all of my effort in it. For the most part, that's how school has always been.

In elementary, I had one of the poorest grades (not necessarily failing but in a class of 30 students I usually got around the 27th "highest" marks). Why? Because I know all I needed is 75% to graduate and go to the next grade level. Plus its pretty pointless after seeing how stressed my classmates were at trying to impress their parents. In high school, I actually was more motivated to get higher grades. Still not the highest, again, I don't see the point if you're just trying to impress your mom or dad. But it was significantly higher; my GPA was 3.36 when I graduated Gr. 12. Interestingly enough, what motivated me was because it was that much easier to get higher grades coz I finally had classmates who were lazier than me. Haha! Then it got bad again in university. Still the same rational as before but also I think whatever your GPA is (granted that its above or at the passing mark), you still get the same piece of paper saying bachelors of something something. When you get a job interview, its nice to see that you got such and such degree but its really your personality that will shine through. So I figure, I didn't have to try too much... especially since my career ambition wasn't that high anyway. But let's get something straight, if I wanted to be a surgeon, you bet I'd study my ass off.

It's not until now that I've been really motivated to study hard. Why? Because I know there's a promising career at the end of this program. I'm also really enjoying what I'm learning. And the most important part, I'm doing this for myself... and not to impress anyone.

Yes, its a little scary since semester 2 has now begun. I'm that much closer to doing my practicum; to taking my license exams; to doing that job interview. But even then, I'm still motivate to move forward... and maintain that 4.02 GPA I now have. Hehe.

[Update: July 26, 2014]
First assignment for semester 2, I got the highest mark. Boo yeah!

Determined to kick butt

I know marks aren't everything but I honestly can't recall the last time I felt this competitive about grades. Though I have no clue what the average of the class is or how much my classmates are exactly getting... just seeing 100% on my quizzes, assignments and lab works is making me wanna study even more. I'm really thankful to have awesome teachers who willingly share their knowledge and passion about the program. Then there's also my classmates who are just as eager about learning and continue to help each other out. It's only been 4 weeks but we've been a tight knit group. It'd be really cool to end up working with these people someday.

Now, if I could just be as eager about my new department at work. I'm officially a barista! Pretty cool coz I always wanted to have that experience but I figure I've had way too many entry-level jobs already and should really try to go further in whatever job I currently had. Now, its like the 2 worlds collide and I get both. The sucky part is the timing. The team lead is brand new to that department and has only been trained 2-4 weeks ago. She was on vacation when I started so my first shift got cancelled since no one could train me. My eventual real first shift, she was only there for half the time, so it was cut short. During that time, she was also busy actually serving so she couldn't really train me. Tomorrow's my 2nd shift and she won't even be there. Gah, I don't even feel competent enough to work the cash register plus I don't know enough about the products we serve. I hope it won't be as busy so I can actually learn from someone. Oh and even more annoying, no apron and cap and training journal was prepared for me so I had to borrow other people's stuff. I think they ran out coz our company had a cross-training event and I guess lots of people signed up for being a barista. So needless to say my hours actually became less than what it would've been if I stayed in my old department. Which really sucks since I'll have to pay my car insurance and 2nd instalment of my tuition soon. If I do get better at being a barista and my hours still don't go up, I'll totally complain about this and transfer back to my old work station.

Step by step

You just can't help but feel thankful when you know that the universe is on your side. A total 180 from the previous post.

This was weeks ago but I've only manage to post it now. So, I was having one of those blue days at work. Despite receiving the best annual review, I was really down about my schedule. The supervisors kept emphasizing that the amount of shifts reflects your performance at work. So I was really confused why they say I got the highest review but basically one of the lowest amount of shift. Part of me was convincing myself that they did this coz they know I'd understand and it made it fair to those who always had fewer shifts than me. And yes, I understand the making it fair part because those who did have fewer shifts than me were not necessarily bad at their job. Its just that I was better. I also know they need the money more than I do. Plus with school starting, I really could only work one or two shifts per week so what difference does it make when they start limiting my shifts. So I kept this complaint to myself.

Well, I guess that paid off. Either they were scared of losing me or they finally realized I could move on within the company and not have to compete hours with other capable employees. I don't know why but suddenly 3 departments want to recruit me and another co-worker, who I can guess also got a really high review. I gave them my potential schedule which has more availabilities but shorter shifts. It doesn't matter for me if I get transferred or not. But wow, that feeling of suddenly being in demand and appreciated. Haven't felt that in a long time with all the negativity going on at work

And here's a little bonus. CD found the new schedule I submitted for the other departments. He took and hid them from the other supervisors. So if I don't get transferred, that's why. Insert giggly girl moment.

Another way the universe makes me feel awesome today is because today was the first day of school. Its weird being excited for it. I used to hate school and couldn't wait to graduate and just work. But this time its different because I'm studying for a career I really can't wait to have. Plus there's a real high chance of getting top marks in this class of 20 students. Having this endless possibilities is really great because it makes me look forward to many things in life. Each day that passes by reminds me of how much closer I am to reaching my goal. Not to mention, its a brand new group of people I can potentially hangout with. Hopefully there won't be any drama like with the issue of jealousy. I seriously can't think of what else about me people could be jealous of. After all, I'm so used to being the jealous one myself.

Man, I'm such in a good mood that I've gone ahead and made flashcards for my class though its not yet required. I've happily done my first homework and finished it before even getting bored of it. My lunch for tomorrow is also packed and I've even picked my outfit. Just hoping the weather coordinates and that I get a normal sleep cycle soon.

Thank you universe. But most of all, thank you God for always looking out for me.