5 Minute Distraction Please

What a great week its been.

1.) We found out on Monday that my best friend passed her nursing exam on her first try.
2.) She had an interview on Tuesday at the same hospital where I work.
3.) She got hired today!!
4.) I passed my jurisprudence exam. (1 down, 2 to go).

Now to fret over the next exams. I seriously have no clue how to study for it. There's really no guidelines unlike the jurisprudence. I feel like I'm just blindly studying whatever I can... and part of me is saying that the stuff I'm reviewing is unlikely gonna be on the test. Then a major chunk of it is calculations. See, I never understood how you study for math. Because for me, its either you get it or you don't. There's no practicing for it because you don't really memorize it but rather know how to apply it. The formulas are pretty much always given... you just input the values to do your calculation. I guess that's sorta the disadvantage of being a math person.

I know I'll be panicking on the day of the exam, telling myself I should've studied more. But it really sucks when you don't know what to study. I did try the sample test before studying and it was still a B-. So I think the trick really is just to carefully read the questions. But its driving me nuts because now that I have time to prepare for this test, I know I'm not utilizing it wisely. I mean hello... I am blogging right now for pete's sake.

Tearfest

I don't know if its just me or if I'm just being too girly sometimes but I do have a tendency to just want to cry for no apparent reason. I don't mean like a baby throwing tantrums. I'd like to think its more of a therapeutic process. I think it happens once I've dealt with too much emotion and I'm done processing it so now it's like I need a major stress release. Although I do remember reading somewhere that tears make our body produce more endorphins thus having that "happier" after-effect.

Depending on my mood I can watch dramas endlessly until I've cried all I can. Sometimes I sing till my throat hurts. Other times I just cuddle a pillow under my duvet and listen to really sad songs until I fall asleep. Lately though, all this blogging is becoming a great emotional outlet. I've also started writing on journals again (by journals I mean word document) and I almost immediately always write something as soon as my emotions get extreme. I think it helps me process my feelings and makes my tendency to over-think look stupid. It's actually pretty funny reading most of them again.

One of the most recent emotional rollercoaster ride is when GF pointed out something that irked him about the party a couple of Sundays ago. During that party CD got a little drunk; probably coz he didn't get enough sleep so it hit him a little faster than usual. There was of course photo sessions during the party and one of which our female common friend (hence forth called CF) asked to have a picture with CD. CD doesn't really like photo sessions that much but this time he agreed then jokingly leaned his head on CF's shoulders. After one shot, I think he realized what he's done so he covered his face and started moving around a lot so it was harder to take a picture. According to GF that's when he noticed that CF and CD may like each other and more so on the guy side. Of course GF is really torn because he is really close with CF.

When this was pointed out I wasn't really bothered but it definitely affected me. I began being more suspicious of both CF and CD. I know CF likes to be extra friendly with CD to tease GF and perhaps even test me on how I will react. For instance, I was actually really surprised that CD agreed to go watch a movie with me and CF. I just worked a shift, had a breakfast party and shopping with him and other co-workers so I was pretty sure he'd say no out of exhaustion. But there was no "maybe" it was a straight up "sure". I was gonna use the opportunity to observe how the 2 acts during the movie; even if it meant I might be a third wheel. However, CF cancelled because she wasn't able to fall asleep. I asked if she already told CD and she replied she did and that also he just slept a few hours ago. That's when I started having my emotional panic. How the hell does she know what time he slept... have they been texting the whole time. All these scenario started popping in my head.

I haven't seen CF since then but I know things between us are still the same. I definitely don't blame her if she does fall for him and him for her. She's a great friend like I mentioned before. However with CD, I worked one shift with him since the failed movie plan and I really felt like he's been avoiding me for some reason. He hasn't been smiling as much either. The latter half of the shift, I also started avoiding him.. not even making eye contact. Sounds childish I know but also I felt like he totally just forgot about me when he didn't call me for break. Basically, I know he's not angry at me but I just don't make a bleep in his radar either. According to another team leader he had an inkling that I didn't hear the break announcement but I guess that wasn't enough for him to confirm if I really did. Ohhh and guess what? I've been re-aligned to be under his team. He is now my direct supervisor. What great timing huh?

I'll really need to cry all these out pretty soon or I might just snap at the wrong person here.

Let the memorants begin!

Hello people (and web bots)!

Welcome to Memorants.

Lost count on what number blog is this one but I really did have a lot before. Different topics while going through various stages in life. I had one about cooking, another about photography, even one about my first car (hoping to record many road trips). I also had one about my one year job abroad but got too busy to document everything. The only thing that was constant about all them was that I always did run out of what to write about. I guess now this one will be a little different. As I said on my self/blog intro below, I really do love to rant... right after whining.

So here's to publicly exposing my own emotional roller coaster!

Anyone wanna pull my hair up while I puke?